The unique bond between a mother and her son is much more than just an emotional attachment. It is an intergenerational bridge, a vector for the transmission of values, beliefs, and know-how. In Africa, where families are often the beating heart of communities, the role of the mother in the education of boys is of particular importance. Indeed, it is within the home that the first representations of the world are constructed, identities are forged, and social norms are inscribed. By educating their sons, African mothers not only shape the future of their children but also contribute to shaping the future of their societies. This article explores how, through education, African mothers can become agents of change and contribute to building more egalitarian societies.
The Mother: The First Role Model
The early years of life are fundamental to a child’s development. It is during this period that emotional attachments are formed and the foundations of personality are laid. The mother, as the primary caregiver, is the first role model with whom the child identifies. She teaches him social codes, transmits her values, and shows him how to interact with the world. Early mother-child interactions play a crucial role in the development of empathy, compassion, and the ability to establish harmonious social relationships.
In Africa, where family values are very strong, the mother-son relationship is often marked by great closeness. Mothers pass on to their sons a rich cultural heritage, teach them the traditions and customs of their community. They also instill values such as respect, honor, and solidarity. These values, while positive in themselves, can sometimes reinforce gender inequalities if they are associated with stereotyped representations of masculine and feminine roles.
Deconstructing Gender Stereotypes
Gender stereotypes are simplified and often erroneous representations of men and women. They limit the choices and aspirations of individuals and can perpetuate inequalities. Mothers have a crucial role to play in deconstructing these stereotypes. By encouraging their sons to express their emotions, develop their interpersonal skills, and take an interest in activities traditionally associated with girls, they contribute to broadening their range of possibilities.
It is important to emphasize that deconstructing gender stereotypes does not mean denying the differences between men and women, but rather recognizing that these differences should not be hierarchized. Mothers can help their sons understand that men and women are born equal before God and the law, have the same value as human beings, have complementary qualities and skills, and can work together to build a more just and egalitarian world.
Education in Responsibility
Educating a son is also teaching him to become a responsible citizen as a friend, companion, leader, father, stranger, etc. Mothers have a key role to play in transmitting values such as respect for others, tolerance, solidarity, justice, and equality. They can encourage their sons to get involved in their community and participate in solidarity actions for all and for women’s causes.
Sexuality Education
Sexuality education is also an essential component of boys’ education. By addressing this topic openly and honestly, mothers can help their sons develop a healthy relationship with their bodies and those of others. They can also raise their awareness of issues of consent, sexual violence, and gender equality. This can better empower them sexually and instill self-discipline to prevent them from becoming perpetrators of early and unwanted pregnancies, rape, GBV, STIs, etc.
Cooking is for Everyone
By introducing their sons to cooking, mothers lay the foundation for gender-equal education from a young age. Beyond simple recipes, they transmit fundamental values: cooperation, sharing tasks, autonomy, and mutual respect. By deconstructing stereotypes related to gender roles, they contribute to forming more open-minded citizens, capable of building fairer and more egalitarian interpersonal relationships, but also men who are able to take care of themselves without any dependence on women in this area. Moreover, a man who masters the secrets of cooking, among other things, will never marry just because he is tired of eating out or poorly cooked food.
The Roles of Fathers and the Community
While mothers are often seen as the first educators, fathers also play a crucial role in shaping a boy’s masculine identity. They serve as male role models for their sons and can transmit positive values such as courage, autonomy, and a sense of responsibility. Co-parenting involving both parents is essential to provide children with a balanced view of masculinity and femininity. An agreement on the content of children’s education is a good way to set an example for these young beings who imitate the adults around them. Statements like “A man doesn’t cry” or “Why are you acting like a girl?” should be avoided to dispel any hint of toxic masculinity and denigration of femininity.
Beyond the family circle, the community also plays an important role in children’s education. Schools, associations, places of worship, and peer groups are all places where children learn and socialize. It is important to create educational environments that promote gender equality and encourage boys to develop their potential in all areas without thinking that girls, the women of tomorrow, were born to perform certain tasks for their happiness.
The Challenges Faced by Mothers
Despite the importance of mothers’ roles in raising boys, they face many challenges. Social norms, economic inequalities, and gender-based violence can limit their actions and prevent them from implementing egalitarian education. Additionally, single mothers or those living in conflict contexts face particular difficulties.
However, there are many initiatives aimed at promoting gender equality and strengthening the role of mothers in education. Parenting education programs, awareness campaigns, women’s associations, and mutual support networks are all tools that can help mothers overcome these challenges. The empowerment and independence of women, both financially and mentally, is a goal to be achieved so that the weight of societal norms cannot hinder them in building a better world.
Future Perspectives
The education of boys is a societal issue that goes beyond the family. To build more just and equitable societies, it is necessary to implement ambitious public policies that promote gender equality from a young age. This involves investing in education, training teachers, raising awareness among policymakers, and combating gender stereotypes in all areas of life.
Yes! African mothers have a decisive role to play in this process of transformation. But they cannot do all the work alone without the help of fathers, the community, policymakers, and society in general. As educators, they can help shape the men of tomorrow and build a future where men and women have the same rights and opportunities.
Pélagie Blewussi